Wednesday, May 6, 2009

why?

Have been really stressed up recently. Work and personal issues. Sigh. And I've been talking to people who are pretty depressed too. Accumulated in a way. Sigh.

Got closer to Jx when she came to Penang. We chatted a bit and got to know her a little better. Turns out she's going to resign and start a new life in Shanghai, alone. I really respected her for her bravery. Apparently working in a large corporation isn't as easy as it seems. Ambitious people are all over and they will do anything to be on top. By whatever means that is. Funny thing this was verified by V too...... sad to see how much they have changed, from being so enthusiastic initially to frustration and resentment at the end. I guess I'll experience it when I return to KL soon enough.

On a different note, Jx brought up a good topic which I found to be rather interesting. She broke up with her bf recently and was not really affected by it. In fact, she was the one who initiated it. She seemed fine to me. Until yesterday while talking to her and she confessed how uncomfortable she's been feeling. How she struggled to put a strong outlook, with a deep scar inside. I totally understand what she was going through. She also brought up this saviour-syndrome she thinks we have. How we get attached or treat people better because we think they needed us. Not sure if it's really out of sympathy but it's within that line. Not a good thing because it'll never have a happy ending.

I somehow feel life's pretty empty now. Not sure why but I don't have anything to look forward to. Not with work. Not with friends. Not with going back to KL. Not even my coming bday. I seriously wanna know why.....

3 comments:

Adrian said...

Isolation for familiarity does that to us sometimes. Just hang in there ... you'll be home soon bro. See you in June.

binbin said...

hey dude..dont so stressed up yeah..i think it's just your pms period right now and the emo-ness is gonna be gone real soon..are you hinting us to throw you a BIG BIG party to cheer you up?? :p

Tick Tock 365 said...

Everything come and go just like when u blinking ur eyes..If ur life not captured with those feelings u will never learn how to treasure ur happy moments. Our life just like a simple circle here it comes and here it goes.. better days is coming towards me n u... (",)